Says Mary

"Oké, je hebt hier dat ding bij je been dat rondgaat in je been," zegt Marie. "Weet je wat ik bedoel? Het voelt net wat meer als een spons aan de binnenkant van je been. En het maakt een krrrk krrk geluid. Het maakt een ander geluid dan andere dingen in je lichaam. Snap je wat ik bedoel?"

"Nee, dat ding voelt meer als een blok elektriciteit en spanning. Meer zoals een zware motorblok. Of bedoel je dat visnetachtige ding met die gekke smaak?" zegt de jongen.

"Volgens mij is het een soort groot hoorspel," zegt Marie. "Want als ik een effectje hier doe, hoor ik het daar en daar."

"Okay, you have this thing by your leg that moves around inside your leg," says Marie. "Do you know what I mean? It feels a bit more like a sponge on the inside of your leg. And it makes a krrrk krrk sound. It sounds different from other things in your body. Do you get what I mean?"

"No, that thing feels more like a block of electricity and tension. More like a heavy engine block. Or do you mean that net-like thing with that weird taste?" says the boy.

"I think it's like a big radio play," says Mary. "Because when I do an effect here, I hear it there and there."

Wat is de les?
Dat we alles van onszelf moeten leren omarmen. Onze gekke kanten. Onze leuke kanten. Onze verdrietige kanten.

Elk stel hersenen is compleet anders.

Je kunt dus niet zeggen: deze persoon heeft ADHD.
Als je zo begint, moet elk mens — elke één van de zeven miljard — een eigen, unieke psychiatrische “ziekte” krijgen. Zo verschillend is de manier waarop iedereen naar de wereld kijkt.

What’s the lesson?
That we need to learn to embrace everything about ourselves. Our quirky sides. Our fun sides. Our sad sides.

Every brain is completely different.

So you can’t simply say: this person has ADHD.
If you start thinking like that, then every person — each one of the seven billion — would need their own unique psychiatric “disorder.” That’s how different the way each person looks at the world really is.

Wat is belangrijk?

Dat je jezelf leuk vindt zoals je bent, zegt Marie. Inclusief je twijfel, angst, gekkigheid en andere snuisterijen.

Snuisterijen?

Dat zeg ik.

Do you literally hear your own voice in your own head? Do you talk to yourself?

 

Why Snails Have Consciousness Too

Consciousness means your body explaining to you how it works—until you realize you and your body are the same thing.

It’s trial and error.

A snail has consciousness too because it also senses its own body. It does something, feels some kind of pressure, and moves forward.

Therefore, consciousness is far more related to learning than to anything else. If you want to make a bold statement:

Consciousness = Learning

You Can Only See It in the Movement

Think of energy as something that moves left and right.

If you do something bad far away, it eventually pops up at a different energy on your side.

Another way to explain it is to see the whole universe as liquid. Do something right, and it comes back left.

For example:

• You ruin the rainforest on that side, you get corona on this side.
• You inhale cigarettes, you get lung cancer.
• You bomb nations, you get terrorism.
• You put plastics in the ocean, you eat plastics.
• You don’t care for animals, humans get sick.
• You don’t take care of the planet, you see UFOs.

And of course, good things work like this too. You do something good, and it spirals back good.

Sounds logical, right?

The hard part is this: energy comes back in a different form. And also in a different size.

It doesn’t return exactly as you put it there (otherwise, if you smoked cigarettes, the result would be smoking cigarettes).

For example:

• You learn to fight, and your relationships get better (because you can stand up for yourself).
• You work out, and your 9-5 job improves.

It’s not necessarily always easy to spot these connections.

An important principle is this: doing smart and good things actually works—even if not immediately.

These relationships are what the brain keeps track of: the relationship between two energy “things” that happen—one on that side, and one on this side. Without something like energy, we wouldn’t be able to process this world. Why? Because there would be no difference between two sides, so there would be nothing to see.

Why You Should Try Living Like a Flower

This is how randomness really works.

When you do something – for instance, you are scared but still go to a birthday – all new possibilities open up, like a flower. When you don’t go, you know a few outcomes, and you are probably correct.

But you can’t know all the new ones that open when you just go.

Like how a flower opens.

Anxiety
You are reading this right now. What I want you to do is put down your computer and actually look at your body. Notice where you feel the fear.
You are afraid of something happening in your body—but you shouldn’t be.

Inside Body Visible
So consciousness is you and your body explaining to each other how you work—until you realize it's the same thing.

If you are so smart, why didn't you figure this out?
Your body is always in an (energy) state. All parts of your body (organs, for example) are also in certain energy states. The pros try to get everything balanced and in top shape. This is the equivalent of mixing different workouts so you optimize per body part. In religion, this is often referred to as Judgment Day because it's like a balance, a scale.

You have no clue how good the best are and how far they already are.

Luckily, you were also already doing this. Or you weren't.

How Consciousness Works: A Practical Example

I’m going to try to explain how consciousness works using a practical example.

I have a wound on my foot. At the same time, I’m sitting behind my computer, working.

Many people might think: I am working, and my foot is repairing itself.
As if there’s a separate “you” and a separate “foot.”

But you are just as much "you" as your foot is. Your foot isn’t repairing itself—you are also the part of your body that is repairing your foot.
You just don’t consciously know how to do it. That’s why your body and your mind constantly explain things to each other. This process is called consciousness—a kind of (beautiful) dance with yourself.

Another Way to See It:

Imagine you have 100 energy points to spend at any moment of the day.

Right now, you’re spending:

• 20 points on work
• 30 points on repairing your foot
• 50 points on other bodily processes

We are always all 100 points at the same time, but we don’t notice because we’re focused on one thing at a time.

The Trick Is This:

Picture a body with a circle around it—everything inside the circle is you.

Consciousness is mainly the distance you create between two things—like a wave—to make a distinction clear.

If everything were on the same wavelength, you wouldn’t perceive differences at all. Everything would just be everything, all at once.

Pain Is a Temporary Exchange with Yourself:

Pain on one side.
You on the other.

You can be everything at once (all the processes in your body working simultaneously), and you can also be two things at once (a "you" and "pain"—which, location-wise, are interchangeable).

Everything Moves in Circles

The first thing to understand is that everything moves in cycles.

• Time moves in circles—the seasons return.
• Thoughts and feelings cycle through your body.
• And even your own face is round and friendly.

Time doesn’t move forward in a straight line. You can’t just keep adding up years, because time also sneaks up on us from behind. Otherwise, we’d have winter once, and it would never come back. (Although, who knows, maybe winter won’t exist much longer.)

Actions have consequences—everything you do eventually comes back to you.

If you don’t take care of yourself—without enough big, cozy hugs—you won’t receive an unexpected love bomb in return.

Echter dan echt zijn

De hoogste staat van bewustzijn is echter dan echt zijn.

Echter dan echt zijn betekent:

• Zeggen: "Het is klote."
• Tegen een meisje zeggen: "Ik wil alleen seks met je, maar nooit een relatie."
• Huilen als je verdrietig bent.
• Boos worden als je woedend bent.
• Tegen je familie zeggen dat ze slap acteren als ze dat doen.
• Je eigen fouten toegeven.
• Tijdens een koffieafspraak na een uur zeggen: "Ik heb geen zin meer in je, ik ga wat anders doen."
• Toegeven dat je iets niet kunt als dat zo is.
• Nooit iemand een compliment geven als ze ergens niets van bakken (want dat helpt niemand).

Op de een of andere manier zijn dit soort basisvaardigheden uit het leven verdwenen.

Ik weet wat je denkt: "Nee, dat is kinderachtig." Maar daar is niets kinderachtigs aan.

Als iedereen dit zou doen, zou je niet de hele tijd spanning hebben. Ik zou zeggen: "Ik vind jou vervelend," en jij over mij, en dan was dat dat.

Dat is juist níét kinderachtig.

Ik ben zelf opgegroeid in een ‘lagere’ klasse, en daar kunnen mensen dit veel beter dan in de hogere klassen. Wat doen ze in de hogere klassen? Dingen verzinnen zoals het boeddhisme. Je hebt geen boeddhisme nodig als je al authentiek en echt bent.

Ik las eens een boeddhistische quote waarin stond: "Observeer je gevoelens van een afstand en zie hoe ze veranderen."
Dit is precies waar het misgaat. Je moet een gevoel voelen (what's in a name). Dan hoef je niets te observeren, want je beleeft het al zoals het is.

Een groot probleem is dat sommige mensen de woede van anderen ten onrechte identificeren als domheid. Ze snappen niet dat als iemand in woede uitbarst, de emmer al de hele week is volgelopen. Het gaat dus niet alleen om dat ene moment. Wat er op dat moment gebeurt, lijkt misschien onbenullig ("Hoe kun je daar nou boos over worden?"), maar dat komt omdat de emmer al vol zat.

Woede zou daarom compleet normaal moeten zijn. Je moet accepteren dat iemand anders iets belangrijk vindt en daar kwaad over wordt. Dat is precies hoe het zou moeten werken.

More Real Than Real

The highest state of consciousness is being more real than real.

Being more real than real means:

• Saying: "This sucks."
• Telling a girl: "I only want sex with you, but never a relationship."
• Crying when you're sad.
• Getting angry when you're furious.
• Telling your family they’re bad actors when they pretend otherwise.
• Admitting your own mistakes.
• Saying after an hour at a coffee meetup: "I’m done with this, I’m going to do something else."
• Admitting that you can’t do something when that’s the truth.
• Never giving someone a compliment when they clearly suck at something (because that doesn’t help them at all).

Somehow, these basic life skills have disappeared.

I know what you're thinking: "No, that's childish." But there's nothing childish about it.

If everyone did this, you wouldn’t have constant tension. I would say: "I find you annoying," and you would say the same about me, and that would be that.

That’s exactly not childish.

I grew up in a ‘lower’ class, and people there are much better at this than those in the upper classes. What do they do in the upper classes? They invent things like Buddhism. You don’t need Buddhism if you’re already authentic and real.

I once read a Buddhist quote that said: "Observe your feelings from a distance and watch how they change."
This is exactly where things go wrong. You have to feel a feeling (what's in a name). Then there’s nothing to observe—because you’re already experiencing it as it is.

A major problem is that some people mistakenly interpret someone’s anger as stupidity. They don’t realize that when someone explodes in rage, their bucket has been filling up all week. It’s not just about that one moment. What happens at that moment might seem trivial ("How can someone get mad over that?"), but that’s because their bucket was already full.

Anger should be completely normal. You need to accept that other people care about things and will get mad about them. That’s exactly how it’s supposed to work.

Je probeert deze squat perfect te doen. Je bent nu niet bezig met je overall progressie. Het gaat alleen om deze squat.

Boekenkast

Als je even wacht, wordt alles weer in hetzelfde vakje ingedeeld. Luister maar hoe je brein dat doet. Alles wordt weer in de juiste categorieën gestopt. Je hoort het zelfs, als een soort boekenkast.

Tijd gaat rond
De seizoenen gaan rond. De winter begint steeds opnieuw. Tijd is zoals de seizoenen en gaat dus rond, niet lineair vooruit.
Hetzelfde geldt voor mensen. Elke 100 jaar loopt er een totaal nieuwe groep mensen op deze aarde. Mensen beginnen dus ook steeds opnieuw.
Evolutie gaat dus ook rond, en niet lineair vooruit.
Als wij plaatjes zien waarop apen evolueren naar mensen, lijkt het alsof het lineair vooruitgaat. Alsof we steeds een beetje veranderen totdat we mensen zijn. Maar het gaat rond.
Wat ook rondgaat, zijn gedachten. Gedachten gaan rond in je lichaam. Ze besluipen je soms van achteren. Je let niet op, en je zit weer in die tak van de boom.

 

Hoe ziet jouw binnenkant eruit?
Ik bewaar mijn gedachten op zo’n stok waar vogels op kunnen zitten. Af en toe pak ik wat van de plank. Soms, als ik iets ben vergeten, vliegt er ineens een vogel naar me toe. Dan landt er ineens een gedachte op me.

 

Hoe je de verhalenverteller in je hoofd gebruikt
Ik gebruik de verhalenverteller in mijn hoofd om dingen te overwinnen. Bijvoorbeeld: als ik ga hardlopen, verzin ik een heel verhaal hoe ik de wereld ga redden. Hoe beter je wordt, hoe beter de verhalen in jezelf worden. Het niveau van je gedachten verandert dus steeds. En op de een of andere manier blijft de verhalenverteller je toch altijd weer verrassen.
Natuurlijk, sommige delen van het verhaal zijn doodeng – maar dan blijkt het toch minder heftig dan het lijkt. Je kunt zelfs op de plek achter je laatste gedachte komen: dit is vaak je grootste angst.

 

Balans is het belangrijkste
Ben jij iemand die alleen in de verhalenverteller leeft en er lekker op los fantaseert? Kies dan een paar momenten per dag om eens met iemand anders te praten.
Alle neuronen in je hersenen praten met elkaar en vormen samen één verhaal. Soms zit er een valse noot tussen die het hele verhaal verstoort. Speur dan niet totdat je de valse noot hebt gevonden: dit kan een nare herinnering zijn of een vervelend gevoel.

 

Het gevaar van de verhalenverteller
De verhalenverteller heeft een groot nadeel: als jij vaak alleen bent en veel in je eigen wereld zit, kun je kwetsbaar zijn voor bepaalde vertakkingen in je verhalenverteller. Als je in zo’n fantasie zit, lijkt het op dat moment de realiteit.
Iets waarvan je op dat moment niet kunt voorstellen dat het niet waar is. Totdat je een jaar verder bent. En dan denk je: ongelooflijk dat ik toen dat en dat geloofde. Nu geloof ik dat helemaal niet meer.
Die kleine dagdromen kunnen grote consequenties hebben. Je kunt bijvoorbeeld in een verhaal zitten waarbij je denkt dat je buren het altijd over je hebben. En dan spreek je de buren, en dan blijkt er niets aan de hand.
Daarom is het belangrijk om contact met anderen te houden en te begrijpen dat je nu misschien in deze dagdroom zit en straks weer in een andere. Ik houd mijn fantasieën voor mezelf, maar ik heb hele extreme dingen geloofd. Over dat anderen slecht waren, of dat ik zelf niets waard was. Nu weet ik wel beter.

 

Waarom doet de verhalenverteller dit?
Ik ben er nog niet helemaal uit, maar ik denk dat de verhalenverteller ons indirect leert om zelf na te denken. En als je niet zelf nadenkt, kom je in de problemen. Als je ergens niet meer over durft na te denken bijvoorbeeld.
Of dat je bepaalde gevoelens niet meer durft te voelen. Dat is ook gevaarlijk.

 

Ik weet soms ook niet meer wat waar is
Gek hè? Ik loop op een wereld en ik kan mijn eigen fantasie soms niet meer vertrouwen. Snap je hoe raar dat is?
Maar omgekeerd geldt ook: stel je van alles wat je denkt weet dat het waar is. Wat zou dat dan betekenen? Want waarheid is ontzettend relatief: het is maar net hoe je het bekijkt. Daarom gaat de verhalenverteller meer over zelf nadenken en je eigen mening vormen. Het kan niet anders werken dan dat. Alleen maar ‘ware’ gedachten hebben, zo werkt het helemaal niet.

En zo wil ik ook afsluiten. Met dat het mooi is dat we de wereld allemaal op onze eigen manier zien.

Nog 1 dingetje: niet al je gedachten zijn dus onwaar, maar ook niet al je gedachten zijn waar.

 

Het allerbelangrijkste dat er bestaat, is hoe je naar jezelf kijkt

Zie je jezelf als minderwaardig, dom of lelijk, dan ga je je ook zo gedragen.
Wat ook heel belangrijk is, is hoe we naar elkaar kijken. Zie jij iemand anders als een ‘autist’ of ‘ADHD’er’, dan gaat die andere persoon zich ook een beetje zo gedragen. Het is dus een kip-en-ei-verhaal.

Zie andere mensen nooit als zielig.
Als je iemand als zielig ziet, gaat die persoon zichzelf als zielig zien, en dan gaat die persoon zichzelf ook zo gedragen. Je kijkt niet naar een label, je kijkt naar een levend wezen.

Door de manier waarop we naar dingen kijken, wordt het dus ook een beetje waar. En niet alleen omdat het al waar was. Daarom is het extra belangrijk om kritisch te blijven kijken naar hoe we kijken.

 

Gedachten zijn het ding ertussen

Er zitten 86 miljard neuronen in je hersenen.
Neuronen praten met elkaar.
Nou, eigenlijk is het meer een soort zingen.

Gedachten praten dus onderling met elkaar, als een soort groep mensen. Daarom moet je je gedachten leren kennen. Dan weet je hoe ze als groep samenwerken. Samen creëren ze een soort heerlijke beat in jezelf.

Zijn sommige gedachten vervelend? Schrijf ze dan op, en vallen ze vanzelf uit je hoofd. Dan ben je er vanaf. En anders zeg je gewoon dat ze moeten opdonderen (werkt echt).

Samen vertellen ze een soort levenslessen, zoals Hazes dat doet.
Daarom werken dagdromen en verhalen die je aan jezelf vertelt zo goed. Neuronen begrijpen deze logica.

soms ben ik het contact met mijn lichaam kwijt
dan ga ik even zitten
hoe voelt mijn knie
aan de binnenkant, zo voelt mijn knie
ik heb je lang niet meer gevoeld
ik durfde even niet meer

De binnenkant van je lichaam moet voelen als een oude jas

Ik denk dat ik weet waarom veel mensen psychische problemen hebben.

Ik heb dit ook lang gehad.

We voelen de binnenkant van ons lichaam niet goed.

Daardoor leven we niet vanuit ons hele lichaam.

 

"Het beste is dat je een tijdje op jezelf gaat wonen," zegt de haas.

"Ik weet wat," zegt de muis. "We kunnen natuurlijk ook alleen een klein muizenstapje doen. Dit is het kleinste stapje dat je kunt zetten. Meer kunnen we toch niet doen: het enige dat je op elk punt in je leven kunt doen, is een klein muizenstapje. We kunnen alleen een klein volgend stapje doen. Hoe groot je problemen ook zijn, je kunt alleen een klein muizenstapje doen."

Thinking for me feels like playing the piano

I feel like Mozart, I feel the rhythm of thoughts, I hear the music, I feel the keys.

I can think without thinking, like a dancer, in one fluent moment.

I lost this feeling at least 30 years ago. I was out of shape. Now, I have it back, like a boxer returning to the ring.

It's the type of thinking that lags when you type in another language, like I do now. In my own language, it's flawless. I feel it's flawed in English, but I still type it in English so that you maybe understand what is possible.

Here I lose track. The piano stops. I have to regain that feeling – now I am over-pushing, forcing too much, forcing the letters on paper. It shouldn't feel like that. When I am in top shape, everything is like a dancer – I pick up a different rhythm again.

It's too much already. It's more beautiful when it's not that much.

Two years ago, I was in a psychiatric hospital. I got picked up by a van.

Now, I play the piano again. Everything is fluent, like butter. I taste and I type at the same time. It looks like a colorful stick when I type. It's like my body is a symphony.

To be clear: this has nothing to do with arrogance. I don’t care if my thoughts are smarter than those of others. It's just that feeling, that piano feeling, everything flows.

Dingen zitten aan elkaar vast in je lichaam.
Ook aan de binnenkant! Ook ‘mentaal’.
Gedachten zitten vast aan bepaalde gevoelens. Zo werkt alles met elkaar samen.

Als je dus problemen hebt met bepaalde gedachten, pijn, of emoties, moet je zorgen dat het hele treintje weer gaat rijden.

Waarom dit belangrijk is
Wij praten over mentale dingen alsof er een verschil bestaat tussen fysiek en mentaal. Maar er is geen verschil tussen fysiek en mentaal. Zoals je voet vastzit aan je been, zit je angst vast aan je buik.

Je moet juist naar dingen toe: als je dingen uit de weg gaat in je eigen lichaam, kan er niets meer over de treinrails. En dan rijdt de trein niet meer.

When You’re Afraid of Your Thoughts

I’ve noticed that people are often afraid of their own thoughts. Sometimes I read things like: “A certain percentage of young people have suicidal thoughts.”
Suicidal thoughts are not inherently bad. Thinking about suicide does not mean you’re more likely to act on it. The real issue is the fear of having such thoughts, the belief that you shouldn’t be thinking them.

That’s not to say young people don’t face problems. On the contrary: I believe many people are feeling lonely right now and missing normal social interaction. And it’s a cliché, but true—social media doesn’t help either.

But the idea that thoughts are bad isn’t entirely accurate. You might find certain thoughts unpleasant, but you don’t need to be afraid of them. Reflect on them. Work through them. But don’t fear what you’re thinking about.

This perspective comes from someone who has made this mistake before and now understands that it’s simply part of life. Thoughts help you build healthy relationships—with yourself and with others. They’re actually useful.

As it says in the Bible (don’t worry, this isn’t a religious piece): the moment you bite into the apple, you learn about good and evil. Thoughts themselves are rarely bad. Thinking is never a bad thing. Are you afraid of something? Then take the time to think about it. Often, the real problem is not daring to think about it at all.

Treat Your Thoughts Like You Treat Your Little Toe

You don’t give your little toe any special, elevated importance in your body. But you also don’t pretend it’s not part of you. In the same way, your thoughts are yours, and you need to own them—just like your little toe belongs to you. But you also don’t put them on a pedestal.

For example, if you’ve experienced something upsetting and it’s left you with a terrible memory, it’s better to remember it as clearly as possible and replay it in your mind. That way, you can make peace with your thoughts.

But it all starts with a simple step: this unpleasant thought—this is mine. Or: this pain, this uncomfortable feeling in my body—it belongs to me alone.

Nothing is Binary

You don’t identify as a man or a woman.
On the other hand, someone says: you’re either a man or a woman. You were born a man (0) or a woman (1).

You are religious.
On the other hand, someone says: there’s either something between heaven and earth (0), or there’s nothing between heaven and earth (1).

A tiny, invisible particle floats through the air.
On the other hand, a scientist says: if I observe you, you’re either a 0 or a 1. How is that possible? You’re left and right at the same time.

You’re not much of a talker and you only have one hobby.
On the other hand, someone says: “You talk so little; you must be autistic. You have autism (1).

This is about the level of understanding we’re at right now. There are people who value freedom (left), and there are people who want to categorize everything (0,1) because reality is still too complex for them.

There are also people who are much further along in their understanding and recognize that the above is a balance. You are not simply autistic (0,1); you’re a person who sometimes displays autistic tendencies. At the same time, you’re many other things (someone who loves colors, parties, candy, whatever).

Putting someone in just one box is, quite frankly, disgraceful.

What Time Means to Me

The most important misunderstanding about time is its nature.
We often think in terms of periods, like a thousand years, as if years simply follow one another in a straight line. But that's not how time works: it moves in cycles. You can never go beyond one day, one night, and 365 days. After that, it starts all over again.

It's better to think in seasons: right now, it's winter, and next year there will be winter again, but slightly different. To say that winter next year comes after this year’s winter isn't quite right—it begins anew.

When you understand this concept, you also understand why you can restart your life at any moment and become a different person. And why each generation has a new chance to make something of life.

When we think of something that happened 10 million years ago, we imagine it as being unimaginably long ago. But if you see time as seasons looping in cycles, you can mentally connect them with ease. Suddenly, 10 million years ago doesn’t feel as far away as we think.

A more rigid, Biblical perspective on this concept is that time (in this case, the clock) is the most dangerous prison you can ever be trapped in. Living by the clock means being imprisoned without realizing it. The clock traps your sense of being. Try it: imagine a world where no clocks exist. You’ll feel different.

If you can live without time, you’ll practically live the same life (you’ll still feel tired in the evening), but you’ll also live more intuitively. Not every day at 2:00 PM feels the same—one day it might feel right to exercise, and another day it might not. Some people exercise every day at 2:00 PM, which is fine, but the chances of it always feeling perfect are slim.

Here’s another example: when I think back to my youth, it feels both long ago and very close. Time has flown by (anyone older will understand this). If you were truly conscious of every minute, everything would move unbearably slowly. But that’s not how it works—time flies.

So, do things not happen one after another?
They do, but you carry forward elements from previous generations. However, the cycles—the seasons—are the primary force, not linear time. Nothing about life, time, or the clock is linear, no matter how much we’d like it to be.

 

Time and Evolution

To us, evolution often feels like a linear process.

But when you observe closely, it's actually discrete. You notice small changes over generations, almost as if each generation introduces a new species.

The Bible reflects this process—those discrete changes over time—and illustrates how it also moves in cycles.

There is only one person who views life the way you do—exactly the way you do. That’s something valuable.

You can also flip it around: everyone has their own unique neurological variation. But we don’t measure that.

Why You Should Be Careful with Labels Like Autism and ADHD – Mary Says

 

Er is maar 1 iemand die zo naar het leven kijkt als jij. Precies zoals jij. Dat is iets waard.

Je kunt het ook omdraaien: iedereen heeft zijn eigen unieke neurologische afwijking. Maar dat meten we niet.

‘’ Waarom je moet oppassen met labels als autisme en ADHD’’ Mary Says

Being Curious Is Never Wrong

I’m going to tell you something you might not believe. Forget for a moment whether or not you believe in anything supernatural—these stories were never about that to begin with. Believe what you want, and, most importantly, learn to think for yourself.
This is about the (brilliant) stories in the Bible.

The Naked Reference #1

Have you ever been so engrossed in something you loved doing that you completely lost awareness of yourself?
A conversation so engaging that you stopped thinking about how you looked or sounded—you were just in the moment. That’s what the apple reference in the story of Adam and Eve is about. Suddenly, you “land back on Earth” and become aware of yourself again: that you’re vulnerable, exposed, maybe even self-conscious. It’s like doing something amazing and then walking past a crowded terrace wondering, “Do I look weird?” That’s normal—it’s part of being human.

The Naked Reference #2

At your core, you are your bare, naked self. Clothes are just layers that cover that. Some people walk through life fully aware of their “naked” essence.

Adam and Eve

The clever among you might have already noticed: this is also about the Adam’s apple—the lump in the throat. The reason it’s visible only in Adam and not in Eve is because the Adam’s apple is only prominent in men.
If you put a man and a woman side by side, it’s clear that Adam took a bite of the apple, not Eve. Adam was just curious about life—so curious, in fact, that he couldn’t resist taking a bite of the forbidden fruit. I’d probably do the same; I’m a curious soul, too. If someone told me there was one apple I wasn’t allowed to eat, I’d think, “Well, that’s too bad for everyone else.” Sorry, not sorry.

Eve, of course, was a sharp and intelligent woman—someone Adam secretly admired. This story is also about the relationship between men and women. Smart men always look up to women because women possess a kind of intelligence that men don’t.

In Summary

This is a story about the human body, but honestly, it wouldn’t surprise me if it were also based on actual events. After all, we carry such a clear reminder of it on our very bodies.

There’s Nothing Wrong

If you don’t take the time to feel, you call it PTSD.

If you don’t want to feel sadness anymore, you call it depression.

If you confuse excitement with fear, you have GAD.

Everyone has multiple personalities.

You need to learn to feel pain and see things for what they are.

If you dared to feel those emotions, you’d overcome your anorexia in an instant.

 

The foundation is this: this gives me a bad taste in my mouth, so it must be bad.
I feel like there’s something dirty inside me, so it has to come out.
That’s the foundation of controlling a body.

Everyone Is Crazy; Most People Just Don’t Realize It

How people with ADHD do things makes perfect sense.

If you start folding laundry and finish the task in one go—impressive.

But it’s no less logical to do this:

1. Fold laundry
2. Think about something else
3. Start drawing
4. Call someone
5. Come back to the laundry

Why? Your brain is a neural network. You’re constantly prioritizing what you find important—that’s what you do all day. Right now, this is important; one second later, something else becomes the most important thing in the world.

This prioritization isn’t limited to a single task, so it’s not inherently logical to finish something in one go, as strange as that may sound.

It is inconvenient, though. But eventually, you’ll get annoyed that you never fold the laundry, and a new learning cycle begins. That’s how learning works.

In the Real World, Causality Only Exists When You Look Back

"In the real world," Mary says, "on a small scale, the world isn’t causal. It doesn’t go from A to B. In this moment, all options are open: I could keep typing, jump out the window, or eat a lollipop. Everything is possible—A, B, C, D through Z, and beyond.

If I look back later and draw a line, then causality exists.

For example, if I decide to work out, it’s a struggle. It’s too cold, I’m almost injured, I’m scared.
In the long term, causality exists: I lose weight, I get fitter.
But the fact that I might lose a tiny bit of weight immediately isn’t relevant—that’s already a correlation.

Causality only exists when you examine a specific relationship within a subject. But that doesn’t mean fundamental particles are causal. In fact, we live in complete freedom, even on the smallest scale.

What People in Physics Are Doing

"Admittedly, I don’t know much about physics," Mary says, "but from what I’ve seen, people are only searching for causal relationships. This particle moves from A to B, and it must always do that. But that’s not how it works—this particle could just as easily buy a lollipop.

This doesn’t mean there are no laws, but not all of them are causal."

The Better You Understand Something, the Simpler the Explanation

Religion is about the human body. This is one of the best-kept secrets in the world.

For example, the story of Adam’s Apple is about your Adam’s apple. The reason Adam ate the apple and not Eve is that the Adam’s apple is only visible in men.

Simple, right?

The reason you think it can't be that simple is that you look down on simplicity—simple logic that even children can understand. You might think: "It can't be that simple! There are so many people who have studied religion."

This happens because, when you don't understand something, you make it more complicated than it is. You give things difficult names in Latin or use extremely complex mathematical formulas to grasp reality. Yet reality is such that even children can understand it. If you can't explain it simply, you don't truly understand it. This applies to both religion and science.

Does this mean religion isn’t true? It’s quite possible that we see history when we look at our own bodies. It’s very possible that the story of Adam and Eve happened just like that. Again, you’re making it too complicated. I look around and see men with apples in their throats and women without.

"If I do this, then that happens, right?" asks the boy.

"Not exactly," says Mary. "It happens somewhat like that, but not precisely. So it's not causal, but it kind of is."

The World Behind Your Eyes

"People who are good with consciousness have spent decades observing how their own bodies work," Mary says.
"Not knowledge from textbooks, but feeling how your body works on the inside—what all the buttons are for, what makes you you, how to take care of yourself.
If you don't know how your own body feels on the inside, with all due respect—you don’t understand much.

Consciousness is much more about the world behind your eyes than the one outside.
Religion, too, is only about the world behind your eyes, not the one outside."

Changing Thoughts

"Your thoughts change over time," Mary says. "I have completely different thoughts now than I did three years ago.
My thoughts are lighter now: 'Oh, how nice, it's snowing today. I'll tell someone how much I like that it's snowing.'
Three years ago, everything felt heavier, mostly because of what I was doing to myself.
I started exercising and eating better. Now those same thoughts feel laughable, not like obstacles."

Freedom

"The most important thing," Mary says, "is to dare to sit and think about that thing.
That thing you're afraid of.
There's tension between the thought and your body.
That tension disappears when you think about it.
But you don't dare, because it scares you. Thinking has become the devil.
But it's not.
Sitting and thinking is the most beautiful thing there is.
That is freedom."

A Label on Someone

"Putting a label on someone is just crazy," Mary says.
"Because throughout the day, you go through all kinds of states.
At certain moments, I'm running around,
at others, crazy.
But always sexy,
and smarter than you."

 

''My name is Mary.
I have been in severe psychiatry twice (meaning: picked up by a van). So, I know what I'm talking about. That was 3 years ago. Now, I live in an expensive house and have a good job.
Over the past few years, I've looked into how this happened. I was always very happy, but kept slipping further down.
Strangely enough, I know one thing for sure:
Psychiatric illnesses do not exist.

But:
That doesn't mean you can't completely lose your way. You can be sick for a while, but that doesn't mean you have a disease.

The question is: how is this possible?
A lot goes wrong in psychiatry, but it's easy to judge from a distance.
First, there's the moment of measurement. Every person is, every day:

1. Hyperactive
2. Overly emotional
3. Overjoyed
4. Terrified
5. Socially disturbed

This happens all day long, without people realizing it. This means that everyone is temporarily sick throughout the day.

The difference is when people experience it very often and for a long time. Are you often afraid? Then you have GAD (Generalized Anxiety Disorder). Are you sad for a long time? Then you're depressed.

The question is, of course, why that is. And that's because we don't take good care of ourselves.

I didn’t take good care of myself for years. As a result, I became sadder and more depressed. I exercised little and ate moderately. I sometimes had little contact with others.

Because of this, it seemed as though I had all sorts of psychiatric illnesses, but that wasn’t the case. My body was working perfectly. I was just doing the wrong things. The signals from my body were correct.

I can already hear you thinking: but what about people who have schizophrenia? Indeed, they can’t take good care of themselves and they need help.
But the point remains the same: the body works the same way and is much more resilient than you think. I no longer suffer from anything and I am happier than the average person.
While three years ago, I was picked up in a van and taken to a psychiatric hospital.

I think psychiatric illnesses exist temporarily because we don't fully understand what's going on. For many common things, like anxiety, you can overcome much more than you think. You can also overcome depression by feeling sadness, not running away from emotions, and exercising. Yes, really."

 

 

 

Life Reflecting Back on Itself

"In hindsight, you understand that it is perfect," Mary says. "If you understood that beforehand, it wouldn't be perfect."

 

I'm in Pain

"I love my own body so much that it hurts," Mary says. "It physically hurts when I look in the mirror; it's just perfect. I feel like I radiate that from the inside too."

 

Artificial Intelligence

"What can AI never do? Feel," Mary says. "And that happens to be what humans are best at."

Sometimes I don't know what to do, and then I think: what would Mary do?

 

"You can't think bad things," Mary says.

Bad thoughts don't exist. Thoughts are made of electricity, and there's no such thing as bad electricity. That doesn't mean thoughts are unimportant, though. If you deal with bad memories, they will never bother you again.

 

"Don’t put people in boxes," Mary says.

You forget that sometimes you're just tired or disappointed. That's human. I don't want to hear anything about ADHD, autism, or anything else—we're talking about people.

 

Lesson 2: Bad Thoughts Don’t Exist

A brain is a network of currents, electricity. Like the lights in your house.

Electricity is never good or bad.

So, bad thoughts don’t exist. Good or bad – they are all bits of electricity.

There are things you may not like or memories you’d rather not think about. But it’s still electricity, so it’s neutral.

So, what happens? You block bits of current in your network because there are things you don’t want to think about. You suppress memories or numb them. As a result, the electricity in your brain flows differently.

Welcome all thoughts: both good and bad.

 

Lesson 3: This Doesn’t Mean That Thoughts Are Unimportant
This is even more important than Lesson 2.

You might now think: if all thoughts are just electricity, then it doesn’t matter. But that’s not how it works.

The reason you have trouble with certain negative thoughts is that they are important to you. You still have something to do with them. You need to face them. You need to step into the darkness.

 

Lesson 3: Combining Lessons 2 and 3
If you combine Lessons 2 and 3, you’ll understand how a neutral network works (relative importance). And then you’ll realize there’s so much more to discover, because your brain is only a small part of your entire body—a part that is currently given too much importance.

 

Lesson 4: Emotions Are Not in Your Brain

Emotions reside in your gut. If you have trouble with emotions, you need to learn how to feel sadness. You do this from your gut.

You can study the brain all you want, but that’s not where the problem lies.

Emotions are far more important than we currently think. Much more important than our brain.

That one minute that everything is perfect

With all your thoughts, the good ones and the bad ones,
All your pain—everything is exactly how it should be at this moment.
That you like Magnum, the one with nuts, and that you are a bit crazy inside,
That you always think that you are crazy,
Or sick,
That it's you that has something—
Even that.

Have you ever noticed that the moment you realize you need to go to the bathroom is binary? It's either a Yes or a No.

But it's also continuous: your bladder gradually fills up.

So your body is both binary (0,1) and continuous (and everything at the same time).

We forget to truly see each other for who we are.

Spiegel

Als je niet kijkt, is het alles. Als je erin kijkt, is het wat. Wat is het?

You Must Learn to Look

Two concepts are important:

Everything you see has color.
What color was the universe before it began? It was black. Everything that now has color is, therefore, what.

You are first naked.

Quantum
You are all your thoughts at once.
You are all your feelings at once.
But you don’t experience them all at once.
So, you are everything at the same time, but you go through it one by one.

It's Sexier When Not Everything Is Revealed

Think of the universe as a classy lady.

She tells us what we are not.

At a fundamental level, we are not particles. Or wave functions.

That doesn’t mean you can’t find out, though.

Why Do Some People Think Something Happened While Others Don't? And Why Is Everyone Still a Little Bit Right?

This is because the perspective from which you can explain something can be so different that it seems like you’re talking about completely different things.
Here’s the best example:

• Big Bang Theory
• Creation

I think many people see these as two opposing theories, as two ideas that couldn’t be further apart. On one hand, you have a scientific theory, and on the other, a theory in which the Earth was created.

But: these two theories are about exactly the same thing, just from a different perspective. Think about it: this universe could have started in any way imaginable—even in ways we can’t conceive of now. And yet, we have two leading theories that are incredibly similar.

How Are These Theories Similar?
First, there was nothing → then there was something.
Both theories have a strong connection to light and sound. Everything started with a bang, or, “in the beginning, there was light.” Once again, the universe could have started in any imaginable way. These two theories are unimaginably alike.

If We Drop a Bag of Chips in a Room
If we later ask people how it happened, everyone will give a different explanation. Especially if you ask why the bag fell. One person might say the Earth pulled it down. Another might say it was because of the air in the bag. Yet another might say it was because someone pushed the bag.

Jouw ene leven, jouw ene energie van 100% is het meest kostbare dat bestaat

Laat ze je niets wijsmaken: het allermoeilijkste op deze aarde is eerlijk zijn over hoe je je voelt.
Je wordt constant getraind om er iets anders van te maken: je traint niet genoeg, mannen zijn niet bang, of als vrouw moet je je zo en zo gedragen.
Eerlijk zijn over hoe je je voelt betekent erkennen wanneer je je slecht voelt: dat is in de praktijk het moeilijkste.
Je gaat heel lang tegen bepaalde gevoelens vechten, in plaats van toe te geven dat je gewoon moe bent.
Als je constant eerlijk bent over hoe je je voelt, en toegeeft, heb je een goed leven. En dat is dus verrassend moeilijk.

Een typische spirituele ontwikkeling gaat zo:

1. Je ziet de wereld als ‘het is wat het is’.
2. Daarna maak je een ritje in de verhalenverteller.
3. Vervolgens zie je de wereld weer voor wat het is.

Een boeddhist wil in deze vergelijking zo snel mogelijk terugkomen bij stap 3.
Een religieus iemand doet zo lang mogelijk over stap 2.

De makkelijkste manier om energie uit te leggen is als volgt:

Je bent je hele lichaam.
Je hele lichaam is altijd 100% energie, bij wat je ook doet.

Er wordt dus altijd 100% energie gebruikt. Energie is datgene wat het dichtst bij het leven staat: het laat je hart kloppen en je nieren werken.

Je kunt dus ook zeggen dat je altijd 100% leven hebt (energie).
En die 100% wordt altijd verdeeld.

In het begin verdelen jouw ouders die energie voor je.
Er gaat nu bijvoorbeeld 20% van je energie naar je hart, 10% naar je nieren, 10% naar het feit dat je nu aan het lezen bent, etc.

Consciousness is het proces waarin je lichaam uitlegt hoe het werkt, totdat jij begrijpt dat jij je hele lichaam tegelijk bent, altijd, de hele tijd.
Je bent nu dus ook alle energie, ook het ding dat je knie aan het repareren is (als je een wond hebt). Zelfs tot op celniveau.

Het leven, of je energie, stroomt dus eigenlijk door al je organen heen en vormt de basis van jouw lichaam.

Voelen is het mechanisme waarmee je de binnenkant van je lichaam zichtbaar maakt.

Iets waar je energie aan besteedt, groeit

Onzin. Als ik met mijn gedachten afspreek dat ik er geen energie aan wil besteden, komen ze niet meer terug.

Belangrijk om te begrijpen is dat je altijd een beetje energie aan meerdere dingen tegelijk besteedt:

• Een beetje aan je hart
• Een beetje aan je gedachten
• Een beetje aan je fantasie

Dit gebeurt tegelijkertijd. Nu. Jouw leven (energie) is dus opgesplitst over meerdere aspecten.
Dat betekent niet dat je in een multiversum leeft: dat is de verkeerde conclusie.
Je was al alles tegelijk. Maar dat is heel moeilijk om te begrijpen.